


Who's Got Your Hand On The Button Now

by incorrect19days



Category: 19天 - Old先 | 19 Days - Old Xian
Genre: 19 days - Freeform, Angst, Cute, Finally, Fluffy, Jian Yi - Freeform, M/M, Zhan Zheng Xi - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-13
Updated: 2016-05-13
Packaged: 2018-06-08 02:49:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6835987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/incorrect19days/pseuds/incorrect19days
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>If not now, when?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Who's Got Your Hand On The Button Now

**Author's Note:**

> When I'm small - phantogram

Zhengxi had put a lot of thought into this. 

After finally deciding he was going to do it. he wanted it to be good.

The realistic option was to just wait until they were together in his room, that was where they were together the majority of the time.

He could drag him back up to the mountain to their spot, but their entire friendship was a cliche, and that seemed like an easy out. 

The park they went to would be appropriate.

Was he really going to do this?  This wasn’t a game. 

This wasn’t something to joke about, not at this point. 

He was in or out.

He didn’t need Jian Yi to tell him that.  
He was in.

It hadn’t been an easy thing to get his head around, but he was in. 

He had so many things he needed to thank Jian Yi for, to apologize for, but at a certain point, a sincere thank you a heartfelt apology seemed less and less significant. 

In a way, it seemed like things had changed slowly. 

But in all honestly, it had hit him like a brick. 

Jian Yi watched him. 

He knew that. 

He felt Jian Yi’s eyes on him more often that not. 

But, one day, he turned his attention back. 

He watched his best friend talk to some classmates. 

He watched him laugh and joke, all the while, looking away. 

One day, for the God knows how many times, Jian Yi was interrupted by some bouncy, nervous girl literally stepping between the two of them. Jian Yi sighed and just walked off. 

Zhengxi moved the girl aside by the shoulders and slowly followed him in, hardly needing an excuse to go to the restroom.

He watched Jian Yi enter a stall, slide down to the floor, and cry,  
This was his fault. He was letting this happen.

He was letting his best friend hurt like this. 

It had to be good.

The hallway began to fill with people coming back from break. 

He was approached by friends, classmates, the same cavalcade of girls.  
They wanted the same thing. It was up to him. 

It was up to Zhengxi to end this.  Right here. 

That’s how he would stop them.  They’ll think he’s gay.

And that’s fine. 

Maybe he was gay.

Maybe he was straight. 

Maybe he was a fucking radish. 

Maybe he was whatever it took to love his best friend.

Maybe he didn’t give a shit anymore. 

He waited until Jian Yi left the bathroom, until he composed himself. 

He held Jian Yi’s head in his hands. 

He waited until Jian Yi gave him a small smile.

He waited until he knew they had everyone’s attention.

He kissed his best friend, and didn’t break away until he knew he’d gotten a reaction from the crowd. 

Zhengxi pulled away, pressing their foreheads together.

If not now, when? 

‘I love you, Jian Yi. I love you, and I’m sorry.'


End file.
